Water is Something That Must Flow
by Kirei Blossom
Summary: Madoushi hated Clow, right? Or did she? Madoushi's thoughts on the events that led to the CCS first movie.


Konnichiwa, minna-san ^_^  I'm taking a little break from "Wishes From the Bottom" right now.  This story had been bugging me too much, so I just had to write it down.  It's not much.  And the writing style is different from my usual style.  But please read it and tell me what you think.

Disclaimer:  Cardcaptor Sakura is owned by the wonderful people of CLAMP and Kodansha.  Not by me.  

Water is Something That Must Flow 

_All this time_…

_I've been waiting_…

_All this time_…

_For a long time_…

_I've been waiting for only you_…

For a long time… 

_For only you_… 

~*~*~*~

You might not know who I am.  But it is okay.  I do not blame you.  No more am I as well known as I used to be.  It is all because of _him_.      

I am a fortune teller.  I use the power of water to look at fortunes.  With my magic, I created a magic well.  People from all over Hong Kong would come to my well.  They would take a look inside and I would tell them their fortunes.  I was very popular here in Hong Kong.  Everyone knew who I was.  Madoushi.  That is what they all call me.  It is not my real name.  I used to have a name, a real name.  But everyone has forgotten that name.  Even me.  But it doesn't matter.  I do not care about what name people call me by.  Madoushi.  Sorceress.  It is all the same.  My fortune telling business had been going well.  

Things were so peaceful.  I was happy.

Very happy.  

But then _he_ just had to come and ruin my life.

Why did he have to come here?!

Why?!

Clow Reed.

I hate him.  

One month ago, he appeared in Hong Kong.  From Japan.  Why couldn't he have stayed in Japan?  Did he have to come here to ruin me?  Ruin my business, my happiness, my life?

The first time I heard about him was from my assistant, Fei.  One day, she came bouncing happily up to my well.  "Have you heard, Madoushi?" 

"What is it?"  I asked. 

"There is a mysterious stranger who has come from Japan.  He is amazing."

"What is so amazing about him?"  

"As this stranger was getting off the boat, he bumped into Cheng.  And before leaving, he told Cheng to stay away from Bird Street today.  Cheng ignored him, thinking the stranger was just joking.  But when Cheng was passing through Bird Street, a whole cageful of parrots got loose and one of them flew straight at his face.  Cheng has a nasty bruise under his right eye now.  How on earth could this mysterious stranger have known?"

I sighed.  It was just like Fei to get excited over the smallest of things.  "It is merely a coincidence."

But how wrong I was.  The next day not a single person came to my well.  Nor the day after that.  For a whole week, only a handful of people came to ask about their fortune. 

I asked Fei about this.  "They are all going to see Clow Reed, Madoushi."

Clow Reed?  This name was new to me.  "Who is Clow Reed?"

"He is that mysterious stranger I was telling you about, the one from Japan." She replied.  "He can tell fortunes.  And all his fortunes always come to pass."

This angered me.  This Clow Reed was diverting my business away to himself.  He had deliberately come to Hong Kong to hurt my business.  Unforgivable! There can only be one fortune teller in Hong Kong.  Only Madoushi!  

I went to see Clow Reed.  He was a tall man, wearing a long midnight blue cloak.  His long hair was pulled back and tied in a loose ponytail.  In his hands he carried a yellow staff.  There was something about him that made my blood boil with anger.  

"I am not a fortune teller."  He told me.  "I am merely answering the questions which people have."

He smiled.  I hate his smile.  How could he stand so calmly, smiling as though nothing were wrong?!  Because of him nobody came to my fortune telling well anymore.  Because of him, Madoushi was no longer the powerful fortune teller who people came to see from all over Hong Kong. 

"I am sorry."  Was all he said.  

"Why have you come here?  You belong in Japan!  Go back to Japan and leave this place to me!"  I yelled at him.  "There can only be one fortune teller here." 

He looked at me with smiling, deep blue eyes.  "I will leave as soon as my business is over with, Madoushi-san."  

I glared at him.  I hated Clow Reed.  He had come here to ruin me.  Leave me with nothing.  Didn't he know that my fortune telling was my life?  He knew that.  I could tell that he knew.  And yet, he only stands there with that calm smile on his face, as though everything would soon be alright.  I hate him.  Clow Reed.  I hate everything about him.  From his calm voice, to his eyes, his personality, his adamant composure…  

I hate Clow Reed.  

~*~*~*~

It has now been a month since I went to see him.  He is still in Hong Kong.  And still, no one is coming to my fortune telling well.  

Wait, there is one young girl stopping by.  She sees me and steps up to my well.  She reminds me of someone, but I can't place a name to her.  

"Would you like to have your fortune read?"  I ask her.

She nods.  I tell her to look inside the well.  She does so.  By reading the reflection in the water, I tell her what is to come for her…

"This is boring.  Clow Reed's fortune was much more interesting!" she stomped her foot and ran away.   

I watch her leave with growing anger and hatred.  Clow Reed had succeeded in completely ruining me.  This was too much for me.  

~*~*~*~

"I challenge you to a fight, Clow Reed!!"  I approached him.  "If I win, you must leave Hong Kong at once."  I was sure I would win.  How could I not?  With my magic, I was powerful.   

"I do not wish to fight you."  He smiled.  That smile again.  I hate it so much.  

"Are you a coward?! Are you scared you will lose?  Why won't you fight me?"  Angered, I blasted a torrent of water in his direction.  He quickly moved aside.

"Please, I do not wish to fight you Madoushi-san."  He turned and walked away.

Coward.

Clow Reed was a coward.  Why else would he not want to fight?  He was afraid he might lose against me and then he would have to leave Hong Kong.  But I was determined.  I would make him fight me.  

Day after day, I went to challenge him.  But I always got the same response.  "Please Madoushi-san, I do not wish to fight you."  He always had that calm smile on his lips.  

I hate Clow Reed.

~*~*~*~

I sighed.  I was so lonely right now, sitting here beside my well.  No one had come to ask their fortune.  Fei was gone.  I was all alone.  I was miserable.  And it was my birthday today.  

Nobody had remembered.  Previously, people would always come to wish me happy birthday.  But not this time.  Clow Reed had taken away the meaning of my life.  My one true happiness, fortune telling, had been snatched away from me.  What more was I to do with my life now, instead of simply sitting here waiting for someone to show up?  I silently gazed at the calm, smooth water on the surface of the well.  The water was so unlike me.  So different..

Just then I heard footsteps.  I raised my head to see who it was.  Maybe finally someone to ask Madoushi their fortune?

My eyes widened.  There, in front of me he stood.

Clow Reed.

"What are you doing here?!"  I demanded at once.  How dare he show up at my well.  

Silently, he placed something in my hands.  "I have brought something for you."  Astonished, I looked down.  It was a hair ornament.  

With my eyes hardened, I glared back at him.  "There is no reason why I should accept such a thing from you."

He smiled.  "Today is your birthday, is it not?"  

I looked back at him with surprise.  Why would Clow Reed of all people give me something for my birthday?

"I have given that to you."  Clow Reed turned around to leave.  His tied back hair swished behind him.  "If you have no use for it, please discard it."  

I watched him walk away.  With confusion, I looked down.  It was a beautiful hair ornament.  But why would Clow Reed give me something?  I have always been so mean to him, accused him of taking my business away from me, and challenged him to fight me.  

Why then?  Why would he be nice to me?

I felt strange.  Never before had I felt like this.  I looked out at the street leading away from my well.  Clow Reed, tall and graceful, was walking calmly away.  Something inside me stirred.  I couldn't explain it.  

What was this feeling in my heart?  It felt light and fuzzy, yet warm and aching at the same time.  What was it?  

~*~*~*~

Fei came by my well the next day.  She seemed worried about something.  "Why, Madoushi… haven't any people come by to have their fortune read today?"

Fei was so innocent.  "No.  Why should they, when Clow Reed is there to take my business away."

"But Clow Reed is leaving today."

My head jerked up.  "What did you say?"

"Clow Reed is going back to Japan today.  His boat should be leaving in a few minutes."  

The world seemed to have frozen for a moment.  Clow Reed was leaving.  He was going back... to Japan.  Never to return.  That feeling in my heart grew stronger.  

Why wasn't I glad?  This is what I had waited for, right?  For Clow Reed to go back to Japan, to leave me alone, and let me be.  

I felt a warm wetness on my cheek.  Raising a hand, I touched my face.  It was a tear.  Why was I crying?  Didn't I hate Clow Reed?  Why was my heart aching so?  What was this feeling?  Why did it hurt so much?  

It was then that I realized.  I didn't hate Clow Reed.  

No.

I loved Clow Reed.  

I had loved him when I first saw him.  I had loved him when I shouted at him, when I challenged him to fight me.  I had loved him all along.  When he gave me the hair ornament, it had helped me realize my feelings.

But he was leaving.. in a few minutes.

I had to tell him.  It might not be too late.  Getting up, I ran down the steps of my well and down the street.  The docks weren't that far away.  I might still be able to stop him.  

Gasping hard for breath, I reached the docks.  But I was too late.  The boat was sailing away in the distance.  Clow Reed was gone.  It had been too late.  I had lost the person whom I loved most.  Taking the ornament from my hair, I pressed it against my heart.  

A gust of wind blew in my face while tears kept rolling down my cheeks.  Clow Reed.  I wanted to tell him something.  But now, he was gone.  It had taken me too long to reach the boat.  Clow Reed was gone.  

With a shudder, I collapsed to the ground.  My heart felt like bursting.  This feeling was so painful; I began to think that I would die then and there.  Hot knives were being thrust into my heart and making it hard to breathe.  But I couldn't die.  I wouldn't die.  

I needed to tell Clow Reed something.  

I needed to tell him that I loved him.

With a new spurt of energy and determination, I got up and walked back to my well.  There, I searched for my spell book.  Tears were still blurring my vision, but I didn't care.  My heart was being ripped into shreds, but I didn't care.  

Finally, I stopped at one page in my book.  It was a complex spell, but I would finish it, no matter what it took me.  I would keep calling Clow Reed back to me with my magic.  No matter how many years it took.  No matter how many decades it took.  I would never give up until Clow Reed was back here with me.  And then…

Then I would be able to tell him.  

Tell him I love him. 

~*~*~*~

_All this time_…

_I've been waiting_…

_All this time_…

_For a long time_…

_I've been waiting for only you_…

_For a long time_…

_For only you_…

_Clow._  


End file.
